I can’t seem to write anything even tangentially related to social justice anymore without panicking and deleting it because of the backlash, not from the right wing, but the left. I feel incredibly silenced by the social justice movement, despite believing in most of its causes. I have distanced myself from most of it.
Maybe could we all be a bit nicer to each other, and use honey instead of vinegar all the time, especially when we’re trying to catch allies instead of kill flies. I see so many potential allies say “fuck it, these folks are jerks” to causes I believe in. And I think they have a right to. No cause is worth the mental anguish that many SJ crowds will put you through. I see so much frustration. I feel it, too.
Activists: wait until the anger leaves. You think you need the anger to drive you, but you don’t. It only blinds you so you can’t tell friends from enemies and lash out at anything around you that moves. It’s reactionary and destructive. Let the anger go away, but in its place will be passion. Love for your side that makes you want to grow your numbers, to be rational and focused and constructive. It lifts everybody up.
Only bullies tear others down to lift themselves up.
Keep calm and have civil conversations.
If you were talking about social justice allies? yeah, I’d agree 100%. On the other hand, telling people who’ve had their compltely justified and righteous anger used as another excuse to ignore, belittle, or further abuse them, to calm down because they’re scaring off people (the same kind of people who have hurt them, and are likely to hurt them again, mind you)? No. That’s not a good idea. Maybe your allies should grow thicker skins and learn to take the heat they bring down on their own heads, because I doubt they’re as innocent and pure as they think they are, especially if they’re ready to abandon the cause of, let’s say, fighting racism because somebody on the internet yelled at them. :|
Love may do all those things you said, but anger motivates. It drives, it can bear you through some heinous shit you never would have thought you could have survived, and frankly it’s a hell of a lot easier to maintain than a deep cosmic love. So, asking someone who’s been oppressed and abused, and may still be on a daily basis, to maintain that kind of love despite the pain and rage they also feel? Not cool.
Overzealous angry SJ “allies” really need to cut down on the vitriol. If it doesn’t affect you, then you have no reason to be nasty with people and start posting Glee gifs. Being angry because someone hit the hot button on something you deal with on a regular basis is understandable. Being angry about something you don’t have to deal with and using that anger to shut down discussion is bullshit. Not to mention that every single time an overzealous angry SJ “ally” tears up a conversation with insults, they aren’t the ones who have to deal with the backlash.
Double this if a marginalized person who is affected has made the choice to engage the conversation in a civil manner with the intent to educate.
This goes triple when “ally” flaming ends up talking over/drowning out the actual marginalized people (which happens way too often).
alladis
Hells to the yes.
A mistake made in ignorance is reprehensible, but there is room for learning. Before it is clear whether the transgressor would be open to learning anything, they are bombarded by insults and they become defensive. End of dialogue. Nothing is gained except a thread of snarky replies that tumblr users gleefully reblog. I see it all over my dashboard and it is ugly. I’m not talking about justified anger in response to intentional, hateful, oppressive, erasing speech. Or even the anger that fights back against ignorant and unintentional hate speech. I’m just saying: give a person a chance to educate themselves once they’ve made a mistake. It’s possible to call someone out without spewing hate and self-righteousness everywhere. At that point, it’s not about social justice anymore. It’s about you and your ego.
